![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
nessanielYesterday, I spent an , unbelievable, absolutely embarassing amount of time watching Kpop-videos. I had a very bad day and needed the entertainment very badly, alright, stop judging me. Now whenever I blink I make jazzhands and thrust my pelvis against things, because boyband moves are addictive.
Also my entire wardrobe is now patent leather, glitter and very tight pants. It ain't easy being a rockstar, I tell ya.
Since I wanna share the mindblowing trashiness and incredibly upbeat happy-happy-joy-joy feelings these weird boybands and their dancing are giving me, I will now show you some videos. Get your discoballs ready, ladies and... well ladies, and hairspray your updos one last time, cause this is gonna be wild, glittery, strobe-light-y and very very colourful and weird.
One should now that I don't even like boybands, usually. But somehow these Korean (and some Japanese) boys and their videos with their high production values, their autotuning and their synchronized dancing are just... adorable. It's especially ironic since I very much dislike the Korean language but I'm croaking out the lyrics with the worst pronounciation ever and I am having so much fun, oh my God, I love this, this is perfect.
1. SHINee - Lucifer (Japanese version)
SHINee is a Korean boyband established in 2008 which is like a thousand years ago in boyband-years and "Lucifer" came out in 2010.
I have no idea how any of these guys are called. I sometimes can't even tell them apart when I'm watching another one of their vids but this is a rather ... uh... typical look for K-pop-videos: cute boys wear a lot of make-up and even MOAR adorable fashionable (YMMV), glittery clothing and they are very synchronized and very good at dancing. It doesn't even matter what this weird song is about (there are subbed versions, if you really wanna know), it will be stuck in your head for the next ... ohh I don't know, ten days or so. No, really, ask my girlfriend, I have been listening to this version non-stop (I'm sorry, pinku).
And yes, I do prefer the Japanese version (it's not unsual especially not for SHINee to produce a Korean and a Japanese version, since Korean Entertainment Industry knows that Japanese Yen are worth something, too!).
2. EXO-K&EXO-M - What is Love (Sehun+Kai)
Okay this one is a bit more complicated because boybands are a serious and batshit insane business in Korea. This boyband is called "EXO" and there are twelve members in this group.
Yes. Twelve.
TWELVE.
12.
十二.
There are six EXO-K (stands for Korean) members and six EXO-M (stands for Mandarin) members. And the video above was actually a teaser video made to introduce each member to the Korean pop-listening public, before the band published their debut single "What is Love" which was called a prologue for whatever reason. (This video here shows every single one of those 23 teasers. 23 TEASERS. KOREA WHAT THE FUCK IS YOU AND YOUR POP MUSIC INDUSTRY. But it's so nice to look at and I wasted a lot of hours on this.)
This is another version of "What is love" and a lot of adorable set pieces and scenery going on. My favourite part is the guy in white who somehow summons a solar eclipse while two other members are on a road trip to Lonely-Wasteland-Area, probably to pick up their friends who are having fun with a kite and also to maybe find out why the very well clad guy is so desperately looking for those rune-stones, while his two friends are just chilling with their puppy in their luxurious loft, maybe waiting for their pals to come back from their weird sci-fi roundhouse-kick-battle with that one street gang.
(I just described the entire video, didn't I. Damn.)
This is way too complicated for a boyband whose members I can't even tell apart already, so the reason I am showing you this video above is the adorable little split-screen scene and because the "dancing alone with a blazer"-dance is such a joy to watch. The song is... okay-ish. I don't like the beginning but the chorus is damn catchy.
3. f(x) - Electric Shock
Look, I know I said boybands, but well... I lied. These girls are so frigging rocking it and I love the song, I love the dance, I love the non sexualized clothing, AND I FRIGGING LOVE AMBER, the one short haired lady because I am apparently the most clichéd bisexual girl ever. f(x) is also the whackiest name for a girlgroup ever (the explanation is so great: f stands for flower, the x stands for the female x-chromosome. You gotta love this).
4. f(x) AMBER - Shake that Brass
THIS FUCKING ROCKS, I LOVE EVERYTHING THAT WEIRD RAPPING, THE CARTOONY ORCHESTRA, THE HIPHOP STYLE BASKETBALL COURT IN THE CITIY OF FUNKY-LIGHTS-TOWNSVILLE, AMBER AND HER ORCHESTRA SITTING IN A LAUNDROMAT, AMBER FLIRTING WITH TRUMPET-LADY AND LONG HAIRED-LADY FROM ANOTHER BAND, AMBER FUCKING ROCKING IT WITH THE MARCHING BAND, I JUST LOVE THIS GIRL OKAY, AND I WOULD PROBABLY PAY A LOT OF MONEY TO SEE HER ACTUALLY MAKE OUT WITH THE CUTE LONG HAIRED LADY.
HOLY SHIT THIS LIST AND THE ENERGY DRINK I JUST CONSUMED ARE NOT GOOD FOR ME, I AM SO PUMPED I AM GOING TO RIP A BLUE WHALE IN HALF. WHY? CAUSE I CAN!
5. EXO - Wolf
This is just on this list for the LOLZ. I mean... THEY ARE HOWLING AT THE MOON. THEY ARE TURNING INTO WOLVES. THEY ARE SCREAMING "ULF ULF ULF" AND I AM DYING. Also this whole early 2000's "The Tribe"-look is so enjoyable. I AM SUPPOSED TO FIND THIS THREATENING AND THEN THERE IS THIS GUY WITH THE RAINBOW HAIR BLINKING AT ME AWWWWW... brb, I need to adopt a lot of puppies, sorry.
There is also a "Drama Version" of this song and another song, called "Growl" - they are not letting this wolf motive go any time soon, guys! - and IT'S THE CHEESIEST MOST WONDERFUL THING I HAVE EVER LAID EYES ON.
THERE IS A SAD BLOND WEREWOLF WHO IS MAKING USELESS PARCOUR MOVES WHILE RUNNING AWAY FROM BAD GUYS.
HE HAS A MILLION FRIENDS BECAUSE HE IS SO GREAT AT FOOTBALL AND DIPPING PEOPLE WHEN DANCING I MEAN FIGHTING.
HE THROWS HIS BESTEST FRIEND THROUGH A WALL AND EVERYONE IS AFRAID OF HIM.
THESE TWELVE THOUSAND BOYS HAVE ONE FEMALE FRIEND AND SHE TAKES CARE OF BLONDIE MCWEREWOLF.
ACTUAL HEALING BY TEARS. ACTUAL THROWING OF PHOTOGRAPHS BECAUSE OF FEELINGS OF JEALOUSY OF OLDER WEREWOLF FRIEND AND ANGUISHED TATTOOS!
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I LOVE EVERYTHING.
6. Boyfriend - Janus
This band is called BAP. Which stands for "Best Absolute Perfect" (shhh, just roll with it, Korean and English have a love-hate-relationship). And yes I am always screaming "VERDAMP LANG HER VERDAMP LAAAAANG" whenever I am clicking on one of their vids.
When I am finished screaming, I AM RIPPING MY SHIRT OF, GRABBING A SLEDGE HAMMER AND DESTROYING EVERY PIECE OF FURNITURE I OWN BECAUSE HOLY FUCKING HELL IS THIS AWESOME OR WHAT.
IT'S POWERFUL, IT'S LOUD, IT'S ROCKY, ONE OF THE BAND MEMBERS (THE ONE WITH THE LOCKS) IS APPARENTLY A PUPPET MASTER MAKING HIS BAND MEMBERS DANCE UNTIL THEY DECIDE TO SHOOT HIM IN THE HEAD AND THOSE BLACK TANK TOPS AND THE FUCKING ED HARDY STYLE JACKETS AND THEIR MASCOT IS A NEON-BUNNY I AM DYING, ALRIGHT EVERYTHING IS FUCKING COLORFUL TRASH I LOVE EVERYTHING.
LEMME JUST BREAK INTO A WAREHOUSE AND SET A CAR ON FIRE AND MAYBE A PERSON TOO.
8. BTS - War of Hormones (i forgot them! BAP DELETED MY BRAIN! thanks![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
ayawinner for reminding me that Top Ten means I gotta actually include ten videos )
"War of Hormones" - guys, really, puberty has been kind to all of you BUT STILL WE DON'T NEED SONGS ABOUT IT. I am not too happy about the colour scheme here cause I like my Kpop LSD-dream-like-colourful (IN CASE IT WASN'T FUCKING OBVIOUS FROM THIS LIST ALREADY) but holy shit am I dying their dancing and their hugging and ALL THEIR CUTE LITTLE SMILES!!! The chorus manages to brighten my mood every time and the hugging at the end is just so CUTE and I am digging the dancing in the gymnasium very much - reminds me of big dance scenes in musical what with the back-light and everything. TOTALLY COOL!
9. B.A.P. - One Shot
Wanna see my reaction when I first watched this video?
Wanna see how a friend described this when I forced him to watch it?
I. AM. DEAD. THIS. IS GLORIOUS. THEY ARE A GANG. A CUTE GANG. DRIVE-BY-IRON-POLING PEOPLE! THE SONG IS FANTASTIC. THEY ARE RAPPING. THE ENGLISH IS HORRIBLE. THE WOOBIE GETS KIDNAPPED. THE LEADER HAS FLASHBACKS. EVERYONE IS TRYING TO COMFORT THE LEADER WHO IS SO SAD THAT THE WOOBIE IS GONE! IT HAS TWO (!!!!) ENDINGS! AND THE SECOND ONE IS EVEN BETTER THAN THE FIRST ONE! PEOPLE ARE DYING! PEOPLE ARE DRESSED IN THE MOST FLAMBOYANT GANGSTER FASHION POSSIBLE. THERE IS LOVE AND TREASON AND FEELINGS AND SUSPENSE I AM DYING.
10. Boyfriend - Witch
I know what you are thinking.
"Kiwi, what could possibly surpass the glory that is B.A.P. "One Shot"?"
I tell you what.
URBAN FANTASY WEREWOLF BOYFRIEND CLIQUE GETTING WIZARDED TO DEATH BY RED RIDING HOOD.
GUYS. TRASH GOTHIC URBAN FANTASY EMO AESTHETIC.
WITH MURDER.
AND MAKEUP.
I AM WRITING FANFIC ABOUT THIS AS WE SPEAK. GET READY SOMMERCHALLENGE ON 120-minuten I AM GOING TO WRITE A BOOK ABOUT THIS I SWEAR.
RED RIDING HOOD IS CAPE-ING PEOPLE TO DEATH.
I AM SO IN LOVE WITH THE WORLD YOU HAVE NO IDEA.
This is what Kpop does to me. I am a mess you guys.
(And yes I am aware that this industry is a slave-driving, people-killing naivete-exploiting business full of the most awful people ever. I know. And I am very conflicted).
To ease the feeling of conflict and because I promisedayawinner I would include this, here is a picture of Japanese actor Ikuta Touma holding a puppy
Also my entire wardrobe is now patent leather, glitter and very tight pants. It ain't easy being a rockstar, I tell ya.
Since I wanna share the mindblowing trashiness and incredibly upbeat happy-happy-joy-joy feelings these weird boybands and their dancing are giving me, I will now show you some videos. Get your discoballs ready, ladies and... well ladies, and hairspray your updos one last time, cause this is gonna be wild, glittery, strobe-light-y and very very colourful and weird.
One should now that I don't even like boybands, usually. But somehow these Korean (and some Japanese) boys and their videos with their high production values, their autotuning and their synchronized dancing are just... adorable. It's especially ironic since I very much dislike the Korean language but I'm croaking out the lyrics with the worst pronounciation ever and I am having so much fun, oh my God, I love this, this is perfect.
1. SHINee - Lucifer (Japanese version)
SHINee is a Korean boyband established in 2008 which is like a thousand years ago in boyband-years and "Lucifer" came out in 2010.
I have no idea how any of these guys are called. I sometimes can't even tell them apart when I'm watching another one of their vids but this is a rather ... uh... typical look for K-pop-videos: cute boys wear a lot of make-up and even MOAR adorable fashionable (YMMV), glittery clothing and they are very synchronized and very good at dancing. It doesn't even matter what this weird song is about (there are subbed versions, if you really wanna know), it will be stuck in your head for the next ... ohh I don't know, ten days or so. No, really, ask my girlfriend, I have been listening to this version non-stop (I'm sorry, pinku).
And yes, I do prefer the Japanese version (it's not unsual especially not for SHINee to produce a Korean and a Japanese version, since Korean Entertainment Industry knows that Japanese Yen are worth something, too!).
2. EXO-K&EXO-M - What is Love (Sehun+Kai)
Okay this one is a bit more complicated because boybands are a serious and batshit insane business in Korea. This boyband is called "EXO" and there are twelve members in this group.
Yes. Twelve.
TWELVE.
12.
十二.
There are six EXO-K (stands for Korean) members and six EXO-M (stands for Mandarin) members. And the video above was actually a teaser video made to introduce each member to the Korean pop-listening public, before the band published their debut single "What is Love" which was called a prologue for whatever reason. (This video here shows every single one of those 23 teasers. 23 TEASERS. KOREA WHAT THE FUCK IS YOU AND YOUR POP MUSIC INDUSTRY. But it's so nice to look at and I wasted a lot of hours on this.)
This is another version of "What is love" and a lot of adorable set pieces and scenery going on. My favourite part is the guy in white who somehow summons a solar eclipse while two other members are on a road trip to Lonely-Wasteland-Area, probably to pick up their friends who are having fun with a kite and also to maybe find out why the very well clad guy is so desperately looking for those rune-stones, while his two friends are just chilling with their puppy in their luxurious loft, maybe waiting for their pals to come back from their weird sci-fi roundhouse-kick-battle with that one street gang.
(I just described the entire video, didn't I. Damn.)
This is way too complicated for a boyband whose members I can't even tell apart already, so the reason I am showing you this video above is the adorable little split-screen scene and because the "dancing alone with a blazer"-dance is such a joy to watch. The song is... okay-ish. I don't like the beginning but the chorus is damn catchy.
3. f(x) - Electric Shock
Look, I know I said boybands, but well... I lied. These girls are so frigging rocking it and I love the song, I love the dance, I love the non sexualized clothing, AND I FRIGGING LOVE AMBER, the one short haired lady because I am apparently the most clichéd bisexual girl ever. f(x) is also the whackiest name for a girlgroup ever (the explanation is so great: f stands for flower, the x stands for the female x-chromosome. You gotta love this).
4. f(x) AMBER - Shake that Brass
THIS FUCKING ROCKS, I LOVE EVERYTHING THAT WEIRD RAPPING, THE CARTOONY ORCHESTRA, THE HIPHOP STYLE BASKETBALL COURT IN THE CITIY OF FUNKY-LIGHTS-TOWNSVILLE, AMBER AND HER ORCHESTRA SITTING IN A LAUNDROMAT, AMBER FLIRTING WITH TRUMPET-LADY AND LONG HAIRED-LADY FROM ANOTHER BAND, AMBER FUCKING ROCKING IT WITH THE MARCHING BAND, I JUST LOVE THIS GIRL OKAY, AND I WOULD PROBABLY PAY A LOT OF MONEY TO SEE HER ACTUALLY MAKE OUT WITH THE CUTE LONG HAIRED LADY.
HOLY SHIT THIS LIST AND THE ENERGY DRINK I JUST CONSUMED ARE NOT GOOD FOR ME, I AM SO PUMPED I AM GOING TO RIP A BLUE WHALE IN HALF. WHY? CAUSE I CAN!
5. EXO - Wolf
This is just on this list for the LOLZ. I mean... THEY ARE HOWLING AT THE MOON. THEY ARE TURNING INTO WOLVES. THEY ARE SCREAMING "ULF ULF ULF" AND I AM DYING. Also this whole early 2000's "The Tribe"-look is so enjoyable. I AM SUPPOSED TO FIND THIS THREATENING AND THEN THERE IS THIS GUY WITH THE RAINBOW HAIR BLINKING AT ME AWWWWW... brb, I need to adopt a lot of puppies, sorry.
There is also a "Drama Version" of this song and another song, called "Growl" - they are not letting this wolf motive go any time soon, guys! - and IT'S THE CHEESIEST MOST WONDERFUL THING I HAVE EVER LAID EYES ON.
THERE IS A SAD BLOND WEREWOLF WHO IS MAKING USELESS PARCOUR MOVES WHILE RUNNING AWAY FROM BAD GUYS.
HE HAS A MILLION FRIENDS BECAUSE HE IS SO GREAT AT FOOTBALL AND DIPPING PEOPLE WHEN DANCING I MEAN FIGHTING.
HE THROWS HIS BESTEST FRIEND THROUGH A WALL AND EVERYONE IS AFRAID OF HIM.
THESE TWELVE THOUSAND BOYS HAVE ONE FEMALE FRIEND AND SHE TAKES CARE OF BLONDIE MCWEREWOLF.
ACTUAL HEALING BY TEARS. ACTUAL THROWING OF PHOTOGRAPHS BECAUSE OF FEELINGS OF JEALOUSY OF OLDER WEREWOLF FRIEND AND ANGUISHED TATTOOS!
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I LOVE EVERYTHING.
6. Boyfriend - Janus
This band is called "Boyfriend" which is in itself pretty hilarious to me already.
Also, uniforms with red sashes.
Also, fire and ice motives and the song is called "Janus" and they are ANGUISHED because of... I have no idea.
Probably heartbreak.
But their bros are coming to help them, they are holding hands (for the white snow magic guys) and hitting people out of melancholy (for the firey maybe hell demon guys).
EVERYTHING IS AWESOME AND PRETTY. I also love this song to death, the CHORUS IS SO CATCHY, GOD DAMN IT, KOREA
And yes, I gave you the version with the weird German subs on purpose to UP THE HILARITY A THOUSAND TIMES.
7. B.A.P. - Warrior
This band is called BAP. Which stands for "Best Absolute Perfect" (shhh, just roll with it, Korean and English have a love-hate-relationship). And yes I am always screaming "VERDAMP LANG HER VERDAMP LAAAAANG" whenever I am clicking on one of their vids.
When I am finished screaming, I AM RIPPING MY SHIRT OF, GRABBING A SLEDGE HAMMER AND DESTROYING EVERY PIECE OF FURNITURE I OWN BECAUSE HOLY FUCKING HELL IS THIS AWESOME OR WHAT.
IT'S POWERFUL, IT'S LOUD, IT'S ROCKY, ONE OF THE BAND MEMBERS (THE ONE WITH THE LOCKS) IS APPARENTLY A PUPPET MASTER MAKING HIS BAND MEMBERS DANCE UNTIL THEY DECIDE TO SHOOT HIM IN THE HEAD AND THOSE BLACK TANK TOPS AND THE FUCKING ED HARDY STYLE JACKETS AND THEIR MASCOT IS A NEON-BUNNY I AM DYING, ALRIGHT EVERYTHING IS FUCKING COLORFUL TRASH I LOVE EVERYTHING.
LEMME JUST BREAK INTO A WAREHOUSE AND SET A CAR ON FIRE AND MAYBE A PERSON TOO.
8. BTS - War of Hormones (i forgot them! BAP DELETED MY BRAIN! thanks
ayawinner for reminding me that Top Ten means I gotta actually include ten videos )"War of Hormones" - guys, really, puberty has been kind to all of you BUT STILL WE DON'T NEED SONGS ABOUT IT. I am not too happy about the colour scheme here cause I like my Kpop LSD-dream-like-colourful (IN CASE IT WASN'T FUCKING OBVIOUS FROM THIS LIST ALREADY) but holy shit am I dying their dancing and their hugging and ALL THEIR CUTE LITTLE SMILES!!! The chorus manages to brighten my mood every time and the hugging at the end is just so CUTE and I am digging the dancing in the gymnasium very much - reminds me of big dance scenes in musical what with the back-light and everything. TOTALLY COOL!
9. B.A.P. - One Shot
Wanna see my reaction when I first watched this video?
Wanna see how a friend described this when I forced him to watch it?
I. AM. DEAD. THIS. IS GLORIOUS. THEY ARE A GANG. A CUTE GANG. DRIVE-BY-IRON-POLING PEOPLE! THE SONG IS FANTASTIC. THEY ARE RAPPING. THE ENGLISH IS HORRIBLE. THE WOOBIE GETS KIDNAPPED. THE LEADER HAS FLASHBACKS. EVERYONE IS TRYING TO COMFORT THE LEADER WHO IS SO SAD THAT THE WOOBIE IS GONE! IT HAS TWO (!!!!) ENDINGS! AND THE SECOND ONE IS EVEN BETTER THAN THE FIRST ONE! PEOPLE ARE DYING! PEOPLE ARE DRESSED IN THE MOST FLAMBOYANT GANGSTER FASHION POSSIBLE. THERE IS LOVE AND TREASON AND FEELINGS AND SUSPENSE I AM DYING.
10. Boyfriend - Witch
I know what you are thinking.
"Kiwi, what could possibly surpass the glory that is B.A.P. "One Shot"?"
I tell you what.
URBAN FANTASY WEREWOLF BOYFRIEND CLIQUE GETTING WIZARDED TO DEATH BY RED RIDING HOOD.
GUYS. TRASH GOTHIC URBAN FANTASY EMO AESTHETIC.
WITH MURDER.
AND MAKEUP.
I AM WRITING FANFIC ABOUT THIS AS WE SPEAK. GET READY SOMMERCHALLENGE ON 120-minuten I AM GOING TO WRITE A BOOK ABOUT THIS I SWEAR.
RED RIDING HOOD IS CAPE-ING PEOPLE TO DEATH.
I AM SO IN LOVE WITH THE WORLD YOU HAVE NO IDEA.
This is what Kpop does to me. I am a mess you guys.
(And yes I am aware that this industry is a slave-driving, people-killing naivete-exploiting business full of the most awful people ever. I know. And I am very conflicted).
To ease the feeling of conflict and because I promised
ayawinner I would include this, here is a picture of Japanese actor Ikuta Touma holding a puppy